We had a really great weekend. Friday evening, we went to see the musical production of BIG, by Rutland Youth Theatre. It was really well done. Jeff's friend Saskia is the director and I admire the fact that she can get fifty kids ages 18 and under to put on a musical. I'm not even sure I could get fifty kids that age to listen to me for five minutes.... On Saturday, we hit the $1 flip-flop sale at Old Navy. Then we had a few essentials to pick up at KMart, Wal-Mart, and Hannaford's. Unfortunately, by the time we got to Hannaford's, the kids were pretty much done and I spent so much time trying to get them to chill that I forgot a bunch of stuff that was on my list. When we got home that afternoon, it was really nice so the kids went outside to play while Jeff mowed. Jeff got the mowing and weed whacking done and then he and the kids were raking up the grass clippings when it started to rain again. I stayed inside and cleaned house and baked cookies. We all showered and then sat down and watched "The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring". I've seen that movie tons of times, and I still cry. Sunday morning was a great church service and then we went to a friend's house for a combination birthday party/ barbecue. It was a really nice day, so all the kids ran and played and got disgustingly filthy. Then we had to make another trip to the grocery store to pick up all the stuff I forgot on Saturday! It was a really great weekend!
I decided last week that I was going to start clipping coupons and saving money. I have been watching "Extreme Couponing" on TLC and getting lots of hints and tips. I have a whole strategy planned and have been clipping coupons and watching ads and getting ready for this weekend's shopping trip. Then I had a major snag in my plan! The coupon printer that I downloaded (which worked for my shopping trip last weekend) no longer works. I have all these awesome coupons, which combined with store sales will save me a ton of money.....and I can't print them. It's unbelievably frustrating. I'm going to keep trying it because maybe it will start working again. I'm also going to try to figure out why it isn't working. I have all the correct system requirements and it says that it's downloaded, but I can't find the download anywhere on my computer. It just keeps disappearing. If anyone out there is a computer genius....I would appreciate some tips or suggestions.
I actually have picked up my knitting needles again this week. I'm behind on a few things. I have several gifts to make, but all the rainy weather made me too lethargic to craft. I would seriously sit there and fall asleep mid-row while rocking in my glider. So I tried switching to the couch. I just fell asleep there, too. Only I was way more comfortable there...and heaven only knows what the kids got up to while I was catnapping for 10 minutes here and there. I just felt it was probably better that I not be dozing, so I put down the needles. Now that I have started back in on a couple of projects, the weather is once again leaning toward rainy and icky. Honestly, it's a bit obnoxious.
Now, for my weekly deep thoughts...My thoughts so far this week have been sparked by our church service Sunday which centered on the book of Acts. The thing that stuck with me was this phrase, "What do you want your home to be?" And I can think of a million things I want my home to be for those who come here. Peaceful, kind, understanding, loving, hospitable, generous, non-judgemental.....are just a few I can think of off the top of my head. But then it occurs to me that because of how things are on a daily basis here, my home rarely gets to be any of those things for those of us who live here. So how do you change a home? You have to change the people who live in it, of course. Or at least the thoughts and actions the people living in it. Since I can only really be responsible for changing my thoughts and actions, I'm working on those things for myself. Honestly, I didn't realize how hard it would be. Children learn by example. So changing my thoughts and actions and encouraging my children to do the same has been my priority. Change, however, does not come easily. And I find that when I'm dealing with people who always expect one thing from me are not pleased when they get something different. It really makes me understand how addicts can fall into dangerous patterns. You keep doing something not necessarily because you want to or because you're proud of your choices, but after a certain point, it's the behavior that everyone expects from you. It's the easiest knee-jerk response. Sometimes, it's easier not to rock the boat. To give in to what everyone expects. At my home, I'm the pushover. Everyone knows that I really dislike conflict. Therefore, when there are disagreements, I get stomped like a weed. And often, even if whatever conflict happens is not my fault, I'm the one left apologizing to everyone. After Sunday, I realized that I did not want that. I don't want my kids to think that it's okay to let other people have whatever makes them happy (even if it makes you unhappy) to avoid conflict. So, I am changing my actions. Please don't take this the wrong way....it's not as if I am currently having disagreements with anyone or anything like that. My family is not awful to me or abusive in any way. It's just a pattern that I notice. I even notice myself giving in to my kids because I desire to have peace with them. That's not really what I think is best for them. I want them to be at peace. I desire to be at peace. However, I have come to the realization that I might have to fight for my peace. So I'm ready and willing to do that. I want my home to be whatever the people I love need it to be. I'm willing to work hard for it, even if it means rocking the boat a little. It will eventually settle....I hope that your homes are all that you want them to be! Until next time, God bless!
I actually have picked up my knitting needles again this week. I'm behind on a few things. I have several gifts to make, but all the rainy weather made me too lethargic to craft. I would seriously sit there and fall asleep mid-row while rocking in my glider. So I tried switching to the couch. I just fell asleep there, too. Only I was way more comfortable there...and heaven only knows what the kids got up to while I was catnapping for 10 minutes here and there. I just felt it was probably better that I not be dozing, so I put down the needles. Now that I have started back in on a couple of projects, the weather is once again leaning toward rainy and icky. Honestly, it's a bit obnoxious.
Now, for my weekly deep thoughts...My thoughts so far this week have been sparked by our church service Sunday which centered on the book of Acts. The thing that stuck with me was this phrase, "What do you want your home to be?" And I can think of a million things I want my home to be for those who come here. Peaceful, kind, understanding, loving, hospitable, generous, non-judgemental.....are just a few I can think of off the top of my head. But then it occurs to me that because of how things are on a daily basis here, my home rarely gets to be any of those things for those of us who live here. So how do you change a home? You have to change the people who live in it, of course. Or at least the thoughts and actions the people living in it. Since I can only really be responsible for changing my thoughts and actions, I'm working on those things for myself. Honestly, I didn't realize how hard it would be. Children learn by example. So changing my thoughts and actions and encouraging my children to do the same has been my priority. Change, however, does not come easily. And I find that when I'm dealing with people who always expect one thing from me are not pleased when they get something different. It really makes me understand how addicts can fall into dangerous patterns. You keep doing something not necessarily because you want to or because you're proud of your choices, but after a certain point, it's the behavior that everyone expects from you. It's the easiest knee-jerk response. Sometimes, it's easier not to rock the boat. To give in to what everyone expects. At my home, I'm the pushover. Everyone knows that I really dislike conflict. Therefore, when there are disagreements, I get stomped like a weed. And often, even if whatever conflict happens is not my fault, I'm the one left apologizing to everyone. After Sunday, I realized that I did not want that. I don't want my kids to think that it's okay to let other people have whatever makes them happy (even if it makes you unhappy) to avoid conflict. So, I am changing my actions. Please don't take this the wrong way....it's not as if I am currently having disagreements with anyone or anything like that. My family is not awful to me or abusive in any way. It's just a pattern that I notice. I even notice myself giving in to my kids because I desire to have peace with them. That's not really what I think is best for them. I want them to be at peace. I desire to be at peace. However, I have come to the realization that I might have to fight for my peace. So I'm ready and willing to do that. I want my home to be whatever the people I love need it to be. I'm willing to work hard for it, even if it means rocking the boat a little. It will eventually settle....I hope that your homes are all that you want them to be! Until next time, God bless!
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